I was watching Dr Phil  the other day.  That is what happens when you wake up at 5 am.  He was doing a show about what was wrong with men.  He had three single ladies on his panel with three single guys.  I only watched about 20 minutes and had to turn it off.  I listened long enough to know these people were single for a reason.  They wanted perfect people right from the starting gate.  

                   I have been with my husband for over 20 years.  Neither of us started out perfect and we still are not perfect.  We have just learned to live with each other with our imperfections.  My husband was the worst date I ever went on.  He took me to a terrible restaurant in the worst section of town.  He never had anything planned.  He was broke most of the time.  He was not a smooth talker by any means.  He still cannot complement me without it all coming out wrong.  BUT I understood he meant well.  I always understood that.  Just because he didn't do things as I expected them, he thought he was doing something nice.  He was nervous. I didn't expect him to read my mind and know what I wanted.  I had to come right out and tell him.  At the same time, I didn't complain all the time.  I didn't demand that he take me to certain places.  I had friends and if I wanted to go to a special restaurant, I went with them.  Dating for us was about time.  We spent time together.

            My husband was never taught to open doors for me, he was never taught how to behave on a date.  We had to  do that together.  I think that is the problem these days.  Parents do not teach their kids anything anymore.  All they expect from their children is to not get on their nerves.  He didn't understand the need for manners.  I was not his mother by any means but I was someone who cared.  I saw underneath a man who wanted to do what was right.  We did not marry perfect people and neither did our husbands.

             My son has been taught.  I have had the thrill of hearing how polite and wonderful he is.  He opens doors, pays for dinner, and had plans.  He makes his date feel like the most important person at that moment.  My daughter knows to be gracious and patient.   She knows how to state her limits without sounding militant.  

             Here is a little tidbit it heard on the show. Ladies take note.  In a survey of men, the big question was, why did they not want to commit to marriage while in a relationship.  The answer, they were already getting the sex they wanted. Interesting isn't it.  Back to that old fashioned thinking.